What's it all about???

My apologies, again, for my absense. My computer was down over the holidays...couldn't be helped. My DH is very happy and excited that we now have (an unplanned) extra Christmas gift...a new computer. Same hard drive with new guts and a new monitor. An expenditure I was not expecting but DH vows to pay it off. It's his cc, his purchase, and both of our (but mostly his) benefit.

Anyway, I'm feeling...hmmm...hard to name exactly what I'm feeling these days. I wouldn't say it's baby blues persay...frustration, agrivation, moodiness, crying spells at time...I guess a general malaze. Every year I tend to build the holidays up in my mind. How wonderful it's going to be. How much fun we'll have. But inevidibly, I end up with some disappointment. I know I should be very grateful for everything I have...and I really am...just somethings aren't working right...such is life...and it's dragging me down. This computer for instance. He's wanted this so bad and although I didn't want to deny him, there's no way I could justify the purchase. I finally gave in...like I had a choice. I decided not to bitch about it much. I just feel like when is it my turn? Maybe I'm just being dramatic. I do get to endulge but it feels like it's been a while for me.

I try to re-examine. I get the $30 haircut while he does the $15. I scrapbook and maybe have $50+ purchases several times a year...but he plays SW online at $20/mth. See...it's hard to distinguish who's getting the better end of the stick. Put it this way, of all the gifts I got this Christmas, the best was Lily...the 2nd best, were the things I bought myself from the girls. I did get 2 really big, wonderful presents from family...but it wasn't what I really wanted. Forgive me if I sound ungrateful. I don't mean to be. Since we've owned our house, I've been complaining about storage. There was some talk in the works about a pantry, or spice rack (I have SR envy from Shay...hehehe). And even a scrapping table would have been nice (BTW Shay, DH lost the CM gifts somewhere in our house...Merry Christmas to me). :(

Another big thing is Curves. I have a free membership to Dart Sportsplex, which is great. But Curves does fit me and my life. I want to go back, but how can I justify the $$. Especially when our budget plan on our oil bill has quadroupled. And I'm trying to pay off my student loan (BTW, there's a whole other story with that re: interest relief...or lack there of...for another day). I just feel worn down with all of it. Oh, and did I mention my sick kid and the other who's a "night owl". Okay, okay...I have pitty pot syndrome. Believe me, I know it all sounds so pathetic. It's just been building over the holidays...the time of year one should be the most merry, joyful and at peace. Instead I'm just a sad sack. *huge sigh* But I know that's what you guys are here for...to let me let it out. Thanks for listening to me wallow, and thanks for being there with all your encouragement over the passed year. 2007 was a better year for us. Let's hope 2008 stays on the upslope.

Blessings to you all. Can't wait to catch up in person in the New Year!
~B

P.S. Anyone interested in season passes to Ski Martock? DH is trying to sell the remaining 3 for his computer fund.

Bern's back in Blogland!!!

Hello all!!! So sorry to be away so long, but I have a REALLY good excuse. :) See the lovely little lady on the left? That's Miss Lily Mary Whitty. She's our newest addition and sweet as pie! The last 10 days have been a rollercoaster...so hang on for the ride.

Leading up to Monday, Dec 10th, I felt some cramps, but nothing that would indicate contractions. The doctor said we could do induction, which I wasn't sure about, but I knew it would mean I wouldn't have to be pregnant anymore. And since I was so uncomfortable, it was music to my ears. On induction day, I started with a bloody show so I thought things might start rolling...not so much. Got to the hospital after 9 and started "pits" (short for pitosin (sp?)) at 11. Then we started doing laps. DH & I walked up and down the hall from noon till 3...when I decided I had enough pain. Sadly I was only 3-4 cm dialated. However, the good thing about induction is you keep taking pits while you're comfortably lying in bed enjoying your epidural.

Getting the epi was tricky. I swear, I didn't think I moved but the doctor said I did. To me it felt like he was feeding the "tube" or whatever in and something just gave way. I could feel something wet streaming down my back. Then he kept repeating "don't move!" Scary. I thought I was leaking out spinal cord fluid. What happened was he hit a blood vessel, so he had to redo the procedure. What hurt worse was the damn numbing...like a bee sting my ass! After that tricky spell, we did get through it and all was right in the world. I lay in bed, contracting like crazy. I could still feel the hardening but not the pain...it was great!

The only other scary moments were watching L's heart rate. It dipped down after the contraction (rather than during). The nurse mentioned we may need to do a section. In the meantime, we tried different positions, the last being on all 4s in the bed...which worked! Pressure was off the cord and I dialated the rest of the way. I was pushing after 6 p.m. In 5 contractions, they could see her head. The nurse told me to stop pushing and frantically got DH to press the call button. The next few pushes, L was out...just before 7 p.m.! It was an easier and quicker birth than E. No stitches or anything. In fact, we were doing so well, we left the hospital the next afternoon. I knew I'd have more help at home and could get more rest than in the hospital. And I didn't want to be away from E another night.

So the passed 10 days, we've all been getting used to L and she to us. She's progressing nicely, last night being the best ever! We took her to see our GP yesterday and she said the colicy crying may be from her not eating enough. We bumped up to 3-4 oz and what a difference. She slept in her cradle and ate without spitting up. She's a dream child...for the moment. :) Well, I really have to go. E's daycare party is at 10 and I'm going to show her that mama hasn't forgotten how special she is. :) I'll try to make a habit of blogging more often...and I have to catch up on my blogger gals news too. Hope you're doing great!

~B

**Sigh**

STILL no baby. Calling the Dr. to get on the induction list. That's all I have to report. I'll keep you posted if anything changes.

~B

Fingers crossed!!!!!!

I got through the night without a pain...except for my hips which woke me up around 5 a.m. Couldn't get back to sleep so just lied there till 6 then got up and made batter for crepes. Believe me, nothing fancy. In fact, whenever we made them at home, it was with cheese slice filling. :) Cheesy crepes for breakfast...so yummy. Anyway, E's home today and since I have my OB appt., DH took the day off too. E requested watching "Robots" so we crashed in the living room. While laying on the couch, L started moving like crazy. I swear she's trying to get out!!! She continued to push her head down which hurt, but made me excited. But once I got up, she stopped. Grrr! Hopefully this will mean she's coming soon. But who knows really??? Could be another few days yet. I hope not!

In other news, Mom & Dad are coming up today...which I'm really excited about! E can't wait! She loves spending time with Granny & Poppy. :) It was so cute doing that book with her and asking her what she likes about visiting them. She said Granny was the best cook because she makes great cookies and biscuits. And she said Poppy is the best singer. :) Adorable! I find it amazing she can be so articulate (sp?) at 2 1/2. Oh Mari, I don't think I told you about her baby (doll)...one of the 6 anyway. Her name is Fabulous. hehehe She got it from Toopy & Binoo. Toopy's always saying, "We're so fabulous!" She also has Baby...who's now become Mary. And there's Suzy, Giggle Baby, Princess and I'm not sure what the Sally Anne baby's called. When she wakes up, first thing she asks is for us to take her babies...usually to the living room. Too funny!

Well, enough babbling about my girl. I better get going and have a quick nap since I likely won't get one this afternoon. I'll try to blog later but if not, I'll definitely give Shay a progress report...hopefully there'll be something to report. :(
~B

The waiting game continues...

So, I'm 2 days over...and NOTHING!!! Well, I guess not nothing...nothing substantial. I had more cramping yesterday...but it didn't last. Nothing throughout the night...which made for an awesome sleep! E woke early though, so I got up with her and let DH sleep a bit longer. Got her ready for daycare and daddy took her, and the van. I'm blissfully stuck at home, watching the snow fall, half paying attention to the news and helping S.C. with gift tags. :)

I feel so bored since I'm just basically waiting. And everyone is as anxious as I am. Mom has me calling them with a daily report. DH, MIL and Shay all called yesterday too. I find it really hard for me because nothing's happening...no matter how much I want it to. Believe me, if anything does happen, you'll all know it! I'll call, blog, FB, whatever, to let everyone know. I said to DH this a.m., I feel like this is the most anticipated birth since Jesus. :)

Besides waiting, I did get the written part of E's book to Mom & Dad done...just have to pick/print out pics. Other than the gift tags, I have nothing left to do! I'll have to take on a new project. Maybe I should knit a sweater. :) Nah...can't knit for beans. hehehe Or I could do that "relaxing" thing DH keeps urging me to do. Last night he suggested renting some gut busting funny movies to see if that would get me into labour. hehehehehe Probably not a bad idea. I'll have to check our DVD collection and see what I can come up with.

Well, guess I better get going. Hope you fair well with the snow!!! Drive safe!! And get your winters on asap...which reminds me, better get DH to put ours on...if they're not already...can't remember. :)

TTFN!
~B

Just a quick note...

...to let you know...nothing's happening!!!! Grr.

Anyway, I'm home with E today so don't have much time to type. We're heading out for a walk...hopefully that will kick start something. :) Other than that, same ol', same ol. Watched some Christmas movies on the wknd and put up a few decorations. Oh and made RC squares (with red/green rcs). That's about it. Hope you had a good wknd. I'll keep you posted if anything exciting happens.

~B